Wonderful description! AND...Why do we as a country tolerate this insanity? The structure of schools in the U.S. is perverse and leads to the exhaustion, anxiety, and damage you describe. I have been teaching in Baltimore for many decades, but about 30 years ago, I learned from my mentor Bob Moses that young people themselves can help us cure the structure--if we pay them. I taught for six years in classrooms with paid youth co-teachers--high school students and recent graduates or even dropouts of the schools where I taught. After school, hundreds of young people over decades ran a math education and youth self-advocacy business, where I was the only "facilitator." They earned millions of dollars. And it was serious and challenging work for me, but the young people did enormous amounts of labor that adults usually do--willingly, creatively, politically, sometimes higher quality and sometimes less--just as with any group. My point is, it was an entirely different kind of stress and exhaustion for me, the "teacher." They loved it, their families loved it, the students they taught loved it, and they made good money. Think how different classroom teaching would be if each teacher had a team of two, three, or four teenagers to help--not in menial ways, but to share in the excitement of planning, discussing, teaching, questioning, exploring, coping. It's very different--less controlled and controlling for sure. But it fits the students' chemistry much better, because it's a youth culture, rather than an adult culture. You sound like a wonderful teacher, and I ache reading your beautiful descrition and the comments. Plus, there must be room for both grief and joy in places that are healthy for young people--for your grief, and for the young peole's grief, and for your joy and their joy. Young people really co-teaching make room for that, because they don't top-down bureaucratic pressure means much less to them than to us. And the result is way more learning, when we don't rush past important emotions. Happy to talk more! Thank you for the beautiful essay!
Thanks so much for the very kind words. That program sounds amazing and is a terrific way to reach students as well as build the pipeline of potential teachers.
You put into words everything I was feeling last week but couldn’t describe. I’m only on year two but I was expecting to end this year feeling much more in control of things. Instead every little thing was a struggle. Reading this helps me give myself some grace!
Glad you found it at the right time! Yeah - giving ourselves grace, after a year of pushing and pushing...that's always tough for me to do. I'm as hard (or harder) on myself at the start of summer for not getting going sooner, with that same condensed-pace version of projects and reading, and working on passion stuff, and I can get hard on myself again at the end of summer break, when I realize I didn't get as far as I hoped on my (impossible) stack of things I wanted to do. I've been getting better lately at just taking each day and focusing on one day at a time, and that helps to make the summer feel long...But I don't need to take it easier on myself. Thanks for the reminder!
Thank you for your articulate, accurate, and helpful explanation of our experiences! I feel seen, validated, and appreciated by your words. I just started Summer Break and started watching The Pitt for the same reason. And, I’m so sorry about your loss - I lost my dad in November and was actually grateful that it was during Thanksgiving Break so that I could have a few days to grieve before going back to class. I hope that you will have some much needed rest and restoration this summer.
First thing I'm doing this coming Sunday after school lets out on Friday, ending year 39, is going camping in northern Michigan. By myself. I don't want to hear anyone say my name for three days while I stare at a campfire. Then, maybe--just maybe--I can think beyond the first week of June.
My thing on the first non-school day weekday is to go out and hike around Pilot Mountain...a good 30 minutes, there, an hour+ of hiking and 30 back. That resets me.
Your writing is clear, poignant, empathetic, and realistic. It is validating (as the prior commenter stated) to have the exhaustion so clearly articulated in ALL aspects.....I'm so sorry about the load that you have carried this school year. The sustained vigilance and the way that no matter what happens you have to set it aside and face the next class....you nailed it in this piece. I found this article worth every minute of reading.... AND I'm sharing it with colleagues. Thanks for taking the time to write.
Spot. On. And, very validating. I’ve been doing this for over 30 years (only 2 left!), and every year I beat myself up over not finishing the year with moments befitting the ending credits of Stand and Deliver or Dead Poets Society (cue credits and inspirational music). Instead I send a pic to my colleagues of a bullet riddled B-17 crash landing on its belly missing an engine. I’m always a bit sad and annoyed that I haven’t “figured it out” after all this time. Greatly appreciated.
thanks for the kind words. And totally get the pic. Was at graduation practice this morning, and now, back in my empty room, am staring at the walls, wondering what of my remaining jobs I should start with. I’ve been doing this for about 15 minutes.
So much of what you wrote has been difficult to put into words for me-for years. So, thanks. Sounds like you had quite a year-decompress this summer.
Thanks - I have. And haven't felt guilty for a moment on the days I only write a little, organize some books,a nd watch a movie in the afternoon.
I am not a teacher, but I acknowledge the hard work they put. They are often unappreciated and overworked.
Wonderful description! AND...Why do we as a country tolerate this insanity? The structure of schools in the U.S. is perverse and leads to the exhaustion, anxiety, and damage you describe. I have been teaching in Baltimore for many decades, but about 30 years ago, I learned from my mentor Bob Moses that young people themselves can help us cure the structure--if we pay them. I taught for six years in classrooms with paid youth co-teachers--high school students and recent graduates or even dropouts of the schools where I taught. After school, hundreds of young people over decades ran a math education and youth self-advocacy business, where I was the only "facilitator." They earned millions of dollars. And it was serious and challenging work for me, but the young people did enormous amounts of labor that adults usually do--willingly, creatively, politically, sometimes higher quality and sometimes less--just as with any group. My point is, it was an entirely different kind of stress and exhaustion for me, the "teacher." They loved it, their families loved it, the students they taught loved it, and they made good money. Think how different classroom teaching would be if each teacher had a team of two, three, or four teenagers to help--not in menial ways, but to share in the excitement of planning, discussing, teaching, questioning, exploring, coping. It's very different--less controlled and controlling for sure. But it fits the students' chemistry much better, because it's a youth culture, rather than an adult culture. You sound like a wonderful teacher, and I ache reading your beautiful descrition and the comments. Plus, there must be room for both grief and joy in places that are healthy for young people--for your grief, and for the young peole's grief, and for your joy and their joy. Young people really co-teaching make room for that, because they don't top-down bureaucratic pressure means much less to them than to us. And the result is way more learning, when we don't rush past important emotions. Happy to talk more! Thank you for the beautiful essay!
Thanks so much for the very kind words. That program sounds amazing and is a terrific way to reach students as well as build the pipeline of potential teachers.
This was my eighth year out, and in May I still find myself tensing up.
You put into words everything I was feeling last week but couldn’t describe. I’m only on year two but I was expecting to end this year feeling much more in control of things. Instead every little thing was a struggle. Reading this helps me give myself some grace!
Glad you found it at the right time! Yeah - giving ourselves grace, after a year of pushing and pushing...that's always tough for me to do. I'm as hard (or harder) on myself at the start of summer for not getting going sooner, with that same condensed-pace version of projects and reading, and working on passion stuff, and I can get hard on myself again at the end of summer break, when I realize I didn't get as far as I hoped on my (impossible) stack of things I wanted to do. I've been getting better lately at just taking each day and focusing on one day at a time, and that helps to make the summer feel long...But I don't need to take it easier on myself. Thanks for the reminder!
Thank you for your articulate, accurate, and helpful explanation of our experiences! I feel seen, validated, and appreciated by your words. I just started Summer Break and started watching The Pitt for the same reason. And, I’m so sorry about your loss - I lost my dad in November and was actually grateful that it was during Thanksgiving Break so that I could have a few days to grieve before going back to class. I hope that you will have some much needed rest and restoration this summer.
thanks for your kind words, and same to you. :)
First thing I'm doing this coming Sunday after school lets out on Friday, ending year 39, is going camping in northern Michigan. By myself. I don't want to hear anyone say my name for three days while I stare at a campfire. Then, maybe--just maybe--I can think beyond the first week of June.
My thing on the first non-school day weekday is to go out and hike around Pilot Mountain...a good 30 minutes, there, an hour+ of hiking and 30 back. That resets me.
One of my teacher-friends has spent May planning for next year. HOW??? I can’t even wrap my head around next year.
Yeah - I have two new classes next year (APs, too...) and I'm going to try to start looking at stuff, but not expecting that to last very long.
Your writing is clear, poignant, empathetic, and realistic. It is validating (as the prior commenter stated) to have the exhaustion so clearly articulated in ALL aspects.....I'm so sorry about the load that you have carried this school year. The sustained vigilance and the way that no matter what happens you have to set it aside and face the next class....you nailed it in this piece. I found this article worth every minute of reading.... AND I'm sharing it with colleagues. Thanks for taking the time to write.
Thanks for reading, and I'm glad it helped.
Spot. On. And, very validating. I’ve been doing this for over 30 years (only 2 left!), and every year I beat myself up over not finishing the year with moments befitting the ending credits of Stand and Deliver or Dead Poets Society (cue credits and inspirational music). Instead I send a pic to my colleagues of a bullet riddled B-17 crash landing on its belly missing an engine. I’m always a bit sad and annoyed that I haven’t “figured it out” after all this time. Greatly appreciated.
Only 2 left! A very early congratulations 🎊
Thank you!
thanks for the kind words. And totally get the pic. Was at graduation practice this morning, and now, back in my empty room, am staring at the walls, wondering what of my remaining jobs I should start with. I’ve been doing this for about 15 minutes.